Word Fast

Ahhh, let me hear you say "outstanding!"  Or tickle my ear with "that sounds marvelous!" Increase my joy by replying "what fun!" Fascinate me by your interest in the tale I told. "What a blessing that must have been!"  "We have two ears, and one mouth....let us listen more, and speak more about "their" positive impact, "their" value, and less about me, me, me. Why not ask more questions, and listen intently? Let us not minimize "their" experience with one of our own. Simply remark on how you perceive the potential THEY have to be a mighty force, a great

blessing to others!  The Holy Spirit dwells within each beleiver. He is just waiting to be asked to take hold of our tongues so that we can speak more blessings!  "Are you listening to what the Spirit is saying?"  We are exhorted to "LISTEN" many times in God's Word. Examine yourself: Does the content of my mind and heart show up on my face as a smile or a scowl?  Are you baffled by doors that have been closed to you? Do people seek to be around you? Are you a light?  Do you consider IF your complaints

about people in authority, or about innocent strangers..."IF"you are pleasing God, or those that hear the complaint? Or do you simply voice whatever runs through your mind without the filter of considering God's purpose? Do you resist changing your pattern of thinking and speaking?  Why? Are your thoughts superior to God's? While observing God's beloved people, are you judging them by asking "Why would anybody say that, or do that?" As Jesus hears every thought, if we remain surrendered to the Holy Spirit, He might respond "Only God knows the motives of man's heart and that we all fall short and need grace."  Are you easily irritated by perpetually optimistic people? Does your level of contentment depend on who wins the game, the race, the election?  Do you grumble when plans change? Do you automatically issue mercy because you have received much?  Do you seek opportunities to encourage?

Do you look for what is GOOD in your spouse, in the White House, your team or the church and speak it? Are you quick to inject a compliment or a complaint? Are you inclined to defend your ways, your thoughts, your actions, your opinions?  Do you listen with both ears and an open mind?  Are you quick to point out the good, the better way when in the midst of chaos? Can you admit that you miss the moment in front of you as you reminisce about the way it used to be?  Will you agree or deny the scripture that paints the picture of a man’s stinking thinking? “What comes out of a man is what defiles a man.” Mark 7:20-23  For our heavenly Father is fully aware of our secret criticisms. Inside every Christian, the Holy Spirit abides, and He is there to help us be purified of all that defiles us. Can you agree that sarcastic humor is just as wicked, or as sinful as profanity or murder?  It is foolishness to deceive ourselves... and pride fully deny... that a critical spirit is not of God.   Lord, in the name of Jesus,  help us heed Your calling for our hearts to be transformed as we put on the mind of Christ.  Wash our minds and uproot  

the deep pockets of judgment that reside in our hearts.   Give us eyes to see what You see in others. A living hope, a holy restoration and the ongoing sanctification through the completed work of our Lord Jesus.  Help us to look and find the good in every situation, in each encounter You set before us.  Help us to control our tongues and speak words that will edify and encourage those You place in our path.  “Whoever slanders their neighbor in secret, I will put to silence; whoever has haughty eyes and a proud heart, I will not tolerate.” Psalm 101:5  To the glory of God, and for His good purpose, as we relate to our brothers and sisters in Christ, it is vitally important that we become a love covering for another believers inappropriate actions or words.  1 Peter 4:8 “Above all, love each other deeply, because 

LOVE covers a multitude of sins”  This truth instructs us to recognize that if we gossip about a wrong choice, or a worldly way in another, we are exposing faults and uncovering them. When we tear down instead of lift up, we are choosing to sin against God's will that we love one another, forgive one another, and issue grace to one another...just as He loves, forgives and issues grace and mercy to us....daily. “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” Matthew 7:2   A dysfunctional Christian justifies his complaining, sarcastic humor, negativity and criticisms.  Jesus taught that there is no middle ground between the kingdom of heaven and the world we live in. “Whoever is not with Me is against Me, and whoever does not gather with Me scatters.” Matthew 12:30  Our judgments’ produce misery and the chronic critic reaps what he sows.  “Yet I will show you a more excellent way” 1 Corinthians 12:31  The polar opposite of a life spent in judgment, criticism, sarcasm and

bitterness is a life filled with complete joy and contentment.  “We know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28 The NEW creation, is NOT a negative person, but a positive, joy filled, peaceful person who identifies with the freedom of Christ Paul had while in prison.  We are either praising God in all circumstances, or we are whining and complaining!  To live “in Me” as I am “in you” is to live in gratitude and contentment.  “Rejoice always. Pray without ceasing. In everything give thanks, for this is the WILL of GOD in Christ Jesus concerning you.” 1 Thess 5:16  Choose to look for whatever is noble, noteworthy or good in every situation, everyday.

Choose to draw people to the Love, Light and Joy that lives inside you.

Choose to rehearse or filter every thought before it exits your lips.

Choose your words intentionally to inspire, uplift and transform.

Choose words that saturate the receiver’s soul with love.

Choose words that cause the hearing face to light up.

Choose words that cause good feelings to emerge into a smile.

Choose to be methodical not mechanical in your praises.

This word picture goes perfectly with our 40 day word fast challenge. We cannot accomplish fasting on negative, pessimistic thinking and broadcasting without our indwelt Holy Helper.  Lord help us hold our tongue.  Help us listen with genuine interest and not just wait for a pause just so we can share our experiences.  Help us intentionally choose words that will uplift, acknowledge, and encourage.  Help us glorify Your plan for the world as we speak Kingdom language. Forgive us for any secretly held thoughts of criticism, judgment, malice or unforgiveness.  Amen ---- "The Forty-Day Word Fast" by Tim Cameron

HOLY SMOKES!

Who never departs from us, Who never ceases to surprise us, Who is everywhere we are, Who gives us courage, Who is always available 24/7, Who is always for us never against us, Who consistently issues us mercy and grace, Who is extravagantly patient with us, Who intercedes in prayer for us, Who squeezes are broken hearts with tenderness, Who is trustworthy no matter who else may deceive us, Who is absolutely reliable to give us wisdom and guidance, Who knows all our secrets and loves us unconditionally, Who replenishes our strength, Who is our constant supplier of all good things, Who knows our needs before we ask, Who fills our emptiness with everlasting love, Who teaches with authority Who God is, Who is pure, praiseworthy and exceptionally excellent in all ways, all the time, Who can you be certain is listening always, Who forgives and forgets completely all our offenses, Who is the Person who knows you more intimately than any human being?????????? He was delivered into you supernaturally when you believed that Jesus is Lord, the King of kings. 

After you surrendered your heart and life to Jesus Christ, this One holy and divine being immediately took up residence in you. He resides and abides in you!  Our most holy and loving Father, our all knowing Jesus masterfully made it possible by delivering the promised Holy Spirit into us.  We have invited Him in to counsel, to guide and to change us.  He enables us to personally embrace the real Truth of Who Jesus Christ is.  The Holy Spirit is NOT a dissipating puff of smoke or a passing feeling...but He is our omnipresent Counselor Who enables us to experience God Himself, Who is always at work "in" us and for us!  A blessing prayer for YOU! I bless your spirit to rise above circumstances and allow the transformation that only Jesus can bring.  Our greatest weapon against the Liar is the Almighty Word of God.  I bless you with a confident and playful life that engages your family and others.  I bless your spirit with a hunger for God's living Word and a supernatural relationship with the Holy Spirit.  I bless your spirit with the freedom to believe and trust God over all the restrictions and beliefs circulating in this world.  I bless your spirit to fly high above what is seen,  with illumined eyes that perceive the unseen and majestic holy presence of God in all situations.  I bless you in the the transforming power of Jesus Christ, the King of kings, in Whom there is absolute liberty from fear and JOY unspeakable.  The danger of drifting in 2021; It is time to renew our monkey mind and BE HAPPY AGAIN! When we go without the nourishment of truth, when the crave comes, we are tempted to fill our spiritual hunger with temporary pleasures. Consuming more food, more thrills, more news DOES NOT satisfy the emptiness. Physical pleasures don't fill us, they can numb us. Numb souls are stagnant souls. Numbed and lulled into complacency, the WOKE wonder why they feel distant from God ?

FASHION POLICE

Crowds were drawn in great numbers to hear what this 2^nd century holy hippie named John had to say.  JB was not into fashion, his hair was matted into dreadlocks; he wore camel hair skins and ate locusts and wild honey.  He had grown up with the Essenes, in an outdoor commune. It was a sect of society that were known to be rigid in their abstinence of all worldly pleasures.  John the Baptist (JB) lived under the Old Testament law, and the severe restraints of the Essenes. In his commune, the human appetite for anything that may corrupt the spiritual goal of purity was denied. They adamantly practiced celibacy and willful poverty. When he was 30, JB began preaching “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is near."  To the dismay of King Herod, many were moved by JB’s spirit filled words.  Throngs of people were confessing their sins and getting baptized by JB in the Jordon River.

When JB encountered many of the Pharisees and Sadducees, the two other major sects of the time, JB screamed “You brood of vipers!  Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?” With fire blazing from the eyes of this crazed looking hippy, he shouted at them “Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. And do not think you can say to yourselves ‘We have Abraham as our father’. I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham." Anticipating the return of the Messiah, JB persisted “The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire." JB painted the picture of the Messiah returning like The Terminator, using a huge blow torch on all sinners. JB stands his ground proclaiming " I baptize you with water for repentance, But after me will come one who is more powerful than I, whose sandals I am not fit to carry.  He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire.” This history recorded in a letter written by Matthew, chapter 3. King Herod feared the great influence JB had over the people of Jerusalem and all throughout the province of Judea.  Feeling insecure, King Herod had JB arrested and imprisoned for two years in the dungeon of a castle called Macherus.  It

was a fortified hilltop palace which is located in Jordan fifteen miles southeast of the mouth of the Jordan River on the eastern side of the Dead Sea. Before JB was imprisoned he greeted the Messiah asking Him “I need to be baptized by You, and do You come to me?”  Jesus replied, “Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all righteousness.” Then John consented. As soon as Jesus was baptized, he went up out of the water.  At that moment heaven was opened, and JB saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove and lighting on Him.  And a voice from heaven said, “This is My Son, whom I love; with Him I am well pleased.” Matthew 3:11-17 ~ So now imagine our JB, a strict Old Testament Jew, raised by the Essenes, sitting alone in a dark prison when he suddenly gets highly agitated upon learning that Jesus has served wine at a wedding, that he healed folks on a Sunday, and that Jesus was seen in a bar talking with sinners, and that He spoke to a prostitute! JB was extremely rattled and he actually questioned the divinity of Christ!

“When JB in prison heard what Christ was doing, he sent his disciples to ask Jesus “Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?”  Jesus replied “Go back and report to JB what you hear and see: the blind receive sight, the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the GOOD NEWS is preached to the poor. Blessed is the man who does not fall away on account of Me.”  Jesus baffles John’s disciples by asking them “What did you go out to see?  A man dressed in fine clothes? A Prophet?  Yes, I tell you more than a Prophet.  JB is the one about whom it is written: “I will send my messenger ahead of You, who will prepare Your way before You.”  I tell you the truth: Among those born of women there has not risen anyone greater than John the Baptist; yet he who is least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.”  Matthew 11:2-16 ~ Man judges by appearances, but our holy God judges us by the content of our hearts.

John the Baptist was highly influenced by the Essenes, of Judea.  The Essenes were stoic and rigidly performed cleansing rituals prior to writing the name of God, Yahweh.  The Essenes were a sect of Second Temple Judaism that flourished in the 2nd century BCE. They were much fewer in number than the Pharisees and the Sadducees who were the other two major sects at the time. They lived in various cities but congregated in communal life dedicated to asceticism which is a lifestyle characterized by abstinence from worldly pleasures, often for the purpose of pursuing very high spiritual goals. Many religious traditions, such as Hinduism, Buddhism, and Christianity still advocate strict restraint with respect to actions of body, speech, and mind. The Essenes rigidly practiced voluntary poverty, daily immersion and celibacy. 

As the forerunner of Jesus, JB lived with great expectation for the return of the Messiah. God had anointed JB in his mother’s womb. When Elizabeth was pregnant with JB and her niece Mary arrived pregnant with Jesus, JB flipped in Liz’s womb, recognizing Jesus Christ as God, his Creator. Zechariah's wife, mentioned in the New Testament as Elizabeth, was barren and therefore the birth of a child seemed impossible. As a gift from God, Zechariah was given a son by the name of "Yaḥya", (John) a name specially chosen for this child alone. In accordance with Zechariah's prayer, God created John and Jesus in the womb, and they were born 6 months apart. God's purpose was to use His two creations to bring the GOOD NEWS message of our Father God, into New Testament times.  The High Priests of Israel had corrupted the truth. This is according to exegesis, which includes the study of the historical and cultural backgrounds for the author, the text, and the original audience. JB was also identified by the prophet Elijah.  According to 2 Kings 2:1-11, Elijah defended the worship of Yahweh over that of the Canaanite god Baal, which was considered as idol worship.  Elijah raised the dead, brought fire down from the sky, and was taken up "by a whirlwind."  In the Book of Malachi, Elijah's return is prophesied "before the coming of the great and terrible day of the Lord,"  making Elijah a harbinger of the Messiah and the eschaton in various faiths that revere the Hebrew Bible. According to Flavius Josephus, Macherus is the location of the imprisonment and execution of John the Baptist. According to the chronology of the Bible, JB's infamous execution took place following his imprisonment of 2 years, shortly after the Passover.

Good Grief

My son Jason moved in with Jesus in 2016. I chose to share my grief journey in hopes of helping other moms who have lost a loved one. Vivid dreams awakened me, and I allowed tears to flow. It is always important to embrace our humanity and weep at times. My Lord's Word refreshed my spirit as He reminded me that a cheerful heart is good medicine. To maintain the joy of the Lord, I chose to abide in His Presence through it all. A time for grief, a pause for memories, and a choice to rejoice in all the Lord has done. My Lord has kept my tears in a jar and He grieves with me. To mourn is to respect Jay's life, and remembering is a holy, healthy thing to do. "Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy" Psalm 126:5 -- My hearts cry was heard and our loving Father returned to me a song of thanksgiving. I am assured that my son is forever in the holy presence of Jesus. However, the pain of never hugging my son on this earth, ever again…returns unexpectedly, months and even a year after his shockingly sudden death.  Extreme emotions yet emerge when I hear the lyrics of songs that we sang together. On the first anniversary of Jay's reunion with our Father, it is in his honor that I lodged some great memories. Music was always a part of our jointly shared joys in this life.  Jason loved to groove to Motown tunes and he displayed his soul on the dance floor.  He made me laugh until I snarkled!  We took many country drives together, windows down with our playlists loudly blasting.  He savored our sweet Mother’s day and Father's day adventures on the road and I can hear him say to me “no worries Momma, it’s all good!” Father's day 2013 was the best Jason ever had.  We rented a cabin at Tower Park in Lodi on the river and Jason was the Captain of the boat that day!  His dog Bella was our mascot and his aunt Sue and cousin David joined us for that glorious weekend. Jason underlined this scripture "My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to Him in song." Psalm 28:7 - On board a cruise ship in 2017 Nicole C Mullen sang "My Redeemer Lives" and my body trembled as my Lord gave me this scripture "He brought His people out with JOY, His chosen ones with singing." Psalm 105:43 ESV - Jesus took Jason out of this world of trouble and heartache, and Jesus chose Jason  - who loved to worship at his church "Lifesong" in Stockton, California!

When Jason was thirteen I took him to his first concert. It was to hear Kenny Loggins at the AG Spanos Center and the most recent was an outdoor performance, in the rain, with Katie and Diana in the Bay area.  Another vivid memory includes busting a gut laughing while Snipe fishing at Lake Alpine shortly before Jay’s dad died.  My son never lost his child-like wonder or the absolute joy of welcoming a new job, or a new friend into his life’s shortened experience.  At Jay’s memorial,  several of his friends stood up to share memories and at the luncheon afterwards one tall man came to tell me that Jason was the glue, the guy who brought two rivalry schools together.  Tom Simmons shared that in the last few months of his life,  Jason’s thirst for the Word of God grew.  He shared Jason’s joy in reading the psalms each morning.   As his mother  I am comforted in knowing --- with full assurance that Jason accepted “His way is right for me.”  There was a lifelong spiritual battle going on for Jason's soul and I Praise God that in the end, our Lord got the victory and won!

On Easter Sunday 2016 Jason was overjoyed that his sister and her family came to his church.  Jason came to fascinate over his ways that had led him away from God, and the unconditional love, mercy and grace he received when he returned to His holy heavenly Father.   Jesus, our Savior tied faith and tears together when He declared “Blessed are those who mourn”  Matthew 5:4 --- Grieving has no time limit as it engages blessed memories of the giant physical presence,  of my son who I shall continue to miss. My grief is a gift that persists on a planet that continues to spin without Jason’s loving, gentle heart standing nearby on it.  Surviving parents need permission to not suppress a sudden violent storm of emotion.  A song, a smell, a shared vista may suddenly trigger a flood of tears. Cloudy, misty eyed days may end in another night of sleepless thrashing.  The hard reality of life without my son wakes me like a slap in the face.  One, two, three

days pass and my grief seems to have subsided and life’s simple joys bring me the confident thought that “I’m doing good”, but then, without warning an avalanche of regret buries me in a grave of grief.   Grieving pays no attention to time, stages, patterns or rules.  Do not worry if you bypassed the “angry at God” stage.  My faith in Jesus Christ and His victory over death will not diminish my grief, nor shall it speak of a measure of my personal  “lack of faith”.  In the book of Hebrews, chapter 12 a few of the listed hero’s of faith were indeed imperfect and at times wobbled in their faith in God.  Grieving parents take heart in the truth.  Each hero listed was  given God’s strength in their weakness. “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His faithful ones.” Psalm 116:15 – No matter how short or long of a time it takes, grief is important to share.  Raw and unfiltered feelings need to come out. If I pushed my feelings down, they would suffocate my soul and I would be subject to lengthy bouts of depression. Without my faith in Jesus I would be inconsolable. Because I believe God's Word and His promises,  I know I'm going to see Jason again.  He is way better off now, and more alive now than he ever was on earth and that is saying a lot. Jason will never be emotionally or physically hurt again.  I also know, with certainty that God's plan is far superior than my desire to hug Jason here on earth.  Today my Lord gave me strength to write about grief, and He reminded me that it is holy to remember.  Picture of Gina, Marissa and me at Lodi airport.

Ecclesiastes describes all kinds of seasons and there is a time for tears, and a time for laughter.  “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.”  Proverbs 16:9 – Jason was at peace in his sweet soul before Jesus escorted him to the perfect room in one our Lord's many mansions, Jay's room will be undoubtedly filled with great music and perhaps a view of a lake and hopefully a fluffy dog. Imagining this gives me great comfort and I am deeply grateful to God for giving me an imagination, the largest nation in the world!   Jason Corey Newell,  Yo Momma, Barbara Sue loves you and today I am loving the memories of our last date in Stockton for mother's day August 2015 - It was 108 degrees, we had no air conditioning and you wore that wet rag around your neck, smiling, never complaining! You picked me up from the airport in Sacramento, we stayed at the Best Western in Galt and then we took a drive along the river and had lunch at Al Da Waps in the old town of Locke. You wanted to take me to Micke Grove Zoo, and it was so hot that even the animals hid in the shade and we laughed!  It was like God impressed upon you to make more memories with yo Momma. More Scriptures underlined by Jason in his bible: "Through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.  And we rejoice in the HOPE of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us." Romans 5:2-5 --- "In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.  We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.  And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit. because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." Romans 8:26-28 --- God poured Agape love into my son's heart and Jason splashed that love all over those he was with.  Jay was certainly nudged by the Spirit to drive his mother to Grupe Park in Stockton to hang out where day "boyz" played hoop. 

You dropped me off at Diana's house and the next day we went to the movies in Lodi to see the "War Room" and Jason wept. We played with three happy black wet retrievers at Aunt Paula's and swam in her pool in Acampo.  Before taking me to the airport we stopped along the river and watched the first football game of the season and shared a burger. ALL GREAT MEMORIES - Today yo momma is listening to a Motown playlist with Marvin Gaye at the top. "What's Going On" --I love you BIG Jason Newell!

"Mother, mother
There's too many of you crying
Brother, brother, brother
There's far too many of you dying
You know we've got to find a way
To bring some lovin' here today - Ya

Father, father -- We don't need to escalate
You see, war is not the answer
For only love can conquer hate
You know we've got to find a way
To bring some lovin' here today

Picket lines and picket signs
Don't punish me with brutality
Talk to me, so you can see
Oh, what's going on
What's going on - what's going on
Ah, what's going on
In the mean time...
Right on, baby, Right on

Mother, mother, everybody thinks we're wrong...
Oh, but who are they to judge us...
Simply because our hair is long
Oh, you know we've got to find a way -To bring some understanding here today

Talk to me - So you can see - What's going on - Ya, what's going on - Tell me what's going on" Yeah my son, I'm still talking to you about what's going on...with me, I'm missing you!  September 10, 2015 was the last day God blessed me with a day with my son, in the sun.  Jason drove me to the Sacramento airport and "our" plan was to see each other again Mothers Day 2016. Click link for pictures of
Jason Corey Newell Eternal Tribute

 

DENIAL DEFINED

Once upon a time, in the midst of a self-made-mid-life crisis, when my frustrations and delusions overwhelmed me, I had a slight glimpse of truth, a heart exposing revelation. That in my campaign to change people, I trampled over boundaries as I pridefully criticized world leaders, my family, friends and the church! Denial kept me blind to my foolish attempts to control people and my environment.  My world of contempt ended when I realized that I was not God and my only option was to surrender my will to His will. "So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall." 1 Corin 10:12 -  In 1997, as I sat in a church in Santa Cruz, I began comparing the joy and peace I witnessed in others, with the sad truth that I was not happy.  I could not stop the tears!  Who was this woman named Grace that Pastor Chip Ingram was talking about?  I so wanted what they all seemed to have, but at that time, I was unable to be healed, because of my stiff necked DENIAL.  Wishing I could be anybody else, my heart silently grieved, and my happy-all-is-well-in-my-soul mask finally cracked.

My fake smile began to pucker under the pressure to APPEAR perfect. "Happy are those who know they are spiritually poor." Jesus went on to say "Happy are the merciful, the peacemakers, the pure in heart, and those who mourn." His sermon on the mount certainly shed much needed light on the foolishness of my ways. The prison of DENIAL had me locked behind the bars of obsessive thinking!  Whose thoughts had I been churning?  Furious thoughts tossed back and forth in my head like a heated tennis match.  "The world should, my mate should, my kid should, the church should, that government should, that politicians should, and that God should change His silent, patient ways and just fix it! "  These demanding thoughts were NOT from God!  God is forgiving and He issues grace daily, whether I recognize and receive it or not. His mercy is new every morning, and His grace was sufficient to save a wretch like me!  What a NUISANCE I was to myself and everyone around me!  Because I "shoulded" all over God, and all over everyone else, I had to admit that

I was the creator of strife in each relationship, including the chasm I caused between the One true and Holy God. In retrospect, my deepest despair was in the trouble I had in accepting and loving others as they are...and the world as it is... as Jesus does..... and NOT as I demand. People who are in DENIAL, want what they want, and they deceive themselves in thinking that they have the ability to change others, and the world, according to their will, ways and perfect preferences. As an overly critical person, for way too long I DEPENDED on myself, NOT GOD,  to initiate all the needed changes so that I could be happy.  I was DEPENDENT on the perfect behaviors of my loved ones for peace to rule in my heart...this was a huge burden for everyone in my life.  When my futile manipulations, subtle suggestions, my blatant blaming, my fits of rage, my all consuming judgements of others became unmanageable--- I collapsed and admitted, I need help.   Today I celebrate my recovery from the stinking thinking of a co-dependent. A co-dependent person depends on people to make them happy. They demand external changes, or insist that others change in order for them to FEEL peace.  The co-dependent me that I was --- HAD TO GIVE; my opinion, my advice, and my help.  My idolatrous devotion to obtaining perfection was nauseating. After honest self-examination, I had to admit that I was pitifully self-sufficient, self-serving, not humble, not kind and not loving and merciful like Jesus. I was certainly NOT reflecting the Light of the world. My aggressive ways to satisfy my NEED to be VALUED and RESPECTED as a person,

eventfully brought me to my knees before the mercy seat of Jesus Christ.  By working the 12 steps and applying the Beatitudes, through the Power of the Holy Spirit, I was enabled to overcome my hurts, habit of stinking thinking, and hang up or hope that the world would change so I could be happy. The saving power of Jesus Christ, and the ministry of the Holy Spirit, established and restored His peace in me.   My part was to surrender my ways, my heart, my desperate needs over to the capable care of Christ.  "Christ in me, His hope for glory"  HALLELUJAH! Admitting that I was powerless to change myself, others or the world was to step out of DENIAL and into RECOVERY.  TRUSTING God with my messy life, REQUIRED that I surrender my hopes, dreams, and desires to His perfect refining purpose in my suffering. God NEVER wastes a single tear or torment. By His conviction to confess, obediently to one another, we are healed.  "Confess your sins to one another so that you may be healed." James 5:16 --- The amazing Grace of God pursued me and He transformed me from an incessantly hungry, unqualified caterpillar, into a butterfly set

FREE from a cocoon of shame. My story: Barbara Sue Alley's ability to trust my father was fractured at the age of 7 when dad molested me and DENIED it. My shocked mother sent me direct to the priest to confess my sin. Shame replaced my innocence as I bowed my head and hoped to be forgiven. My dad rejected me and said "I will never touch you again. You are dead to me."  The consequence of telling the truth to my mother, resulted in my dad's lifelong avoidance of me.  Looking for love in wrong places, at the age of 16 a baby girl was born, removed from my body and adopted away from me. We left the hospital and my mother instructed "We will never speak of this again." My voice or my presence unwanted by my parents,  I chose a life of DENIAL and SECRETS.  Acting as if I was happy became the character I played as the youngest of three kids. My silenced reality was shoved down so deep that I became a natural liar to God, myself and others.  A mighty fortress was erected unconsciously around my heart of stone.  Compassion, mercy or grace were impossible for me to give as I was not open to receive.  My heart grew cold in my secret chamber of fear.  Married or divorced, I regularly and silently sat in Catholic, Baptist, Protestant, Lutheran, Methodist and Unity church pews feeling like an impostor. No matter the denomination, when an alter call was given,  I went forward and got baptized again, and again even after accepting Jesus in 1985 at a Pentecostal church.  "It is dangerous to be concerned with what others think of you, but if you trust the Lord, you are safe." Proverbs 29:25 - Fear of what church folks would think of me,  IF I confessed my shameful past,

kept me silent. A voice, not of God persisted "You will never be acceptable to God" I was unable to trust God with my whole heart, and I held onto my secret shame tightly. For 13 years of church bench warming, endless retreats, seminars, and perfect note taking (all which God used to soften my rocky soil), it was not until 1998, when I was 47 years old, did HOPE begin to rise.  After hearing other broken-hearted, imperfect, hurting women....in Celebrate Recovery, confess their raw hurts, honest fears and feelings of hopelessness... I was moved by the Holy Spirit, to voice my nightmare. God mercifully guided me into Santa Cruz Bible Church, and into a 12 step study for sexually abused women.  After ten months of weekly meetings, and hours with my accountability sponsor, much prayer, and the Holy Spirit showing me truth in scriptures....I came to the END of myself, my pride, my ways. My life long, self-sufficient, leading lady role was over! Gladly I surrendered completely into the capable hands of Christ.  Accepting the Truth that the King of Kings, had not only chosen me, but that He had legally adopted me, as His daughter....that FACT gripped and crushed my stubborn hardened heart.  Loving and forgiving others as I had been by God...with no regrets, no bitterness, completely forgotten, and forever erased...was how God set me on fire for His ability to restore all who FEEL unworthy of His love. I was FREED from shame and the enemy's vicious trap of lies --- for Almighty God's purpose: that I can now courageously share my story, without shame, for what Christ has done in me. "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up." James 4:10

"Let us examine our ways and test them, and let us return to the Lord." Lamentations 3:40 - Obediently, I tested my ways and was convinced that my way of concealing my pain for over 40 years was foolish. Our Father wants to take our burdens and heal us, but we must submit, we must obey, we must trust Him, with the entire contents of our heart. "Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly." Colossians 3:16 - Today I thank God for every struggle, for all things that drew me to Him, and for the tremendous compassion muscles I gained in my suffering. It took the hearing of the word, and the honest confessions of other believers to loosen my tight grip on my shame, and to TRUST GOD. When I chose to truly LET GO and LET GOD, my heavenly Father, have His Holy way "in me", only then was I able to FEEL real JOY for the first time.  Living fully forgiven, and fully restored, I wear His robe of righteousness, and I am enabled to receive His ongoing stream of GRACE and experience His Holy Presence.  His abiding Peace TRULY surpasses all human understanding. Celebrate Recovery is a biblically based 12 Step Program to RESTORE your relationship with GOD and the church, or anyone who may have rejected, hurt or abandoned you.  IF you fear rejection, or IF you are ashamed of your doubts about God's mercy, IF you are addicted to sadness, TV, food, shopping, drama,

or being in control, to stinking thinking, or to convincing others that you are worthy of respect because of all your good deeds....When your inability to love and forgive yourself as God does ..hurts enough, when your DENIAL gets too heavy, and your broken, ineffective life crumbles, I encourage you to hold on to HOPE in Christ. Find a SAFE PLACE with a small group of honest struggling people. All Celebrate Recovery meetings are anonymous. Celebrate Recovery Groups in your area. STEP ONE is to step out of DENIAL and into RECOVERY. We admitted we were powerless over our addiction to: controlling circumstances, people, and the world. We admit that our compulsive behaviors have injured relationships, and that our lives have become unmanageable. We came to the conclusion that without God, we were doomed to live an empty life, without purpose or meaning. "For it is God who works in you to will and to act according to His good purpose."  Philippians 2:13 --- and we humbly submit to the Truth of this holy scripture:  "I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out." Romans 7:18 and with the help of the Holy Spirit we grab onto God's undeniable TRUTH which will destroy all DENIAL...because the truth is:  only the TRUTH will set you FREE...

"Brothers (and sisters) loved by God, we know that He has chosen you, because our gospel came to you NOT simply with words, but also with POWER, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction." 1 Thessalonians 1:4 --- We TRUST God's living Word to enter our brokenness and restore us to wholeness "We have NOT received the (critical) spirit of the world but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us......For who has known the mind of the Lord that he may instruct Him?....but we have the mind of Christ."  1 Corin 2:12-16 We are chosen and given every spiritual blessing "Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in Christ.  For HE CHOSE us ' in Him' before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as His sons (and daughters) through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His PLEASURE and will - to the praise of HIS glorious GRACE, which He has freely given us in the One He loves." Ephesians 1:3-6

Batting hot, cold, or warm?

Baseball season seems to have ended forever. Players are striking as they bid for 500 million dollar contracts?  Are you comfortable with your worth "in Christ?" What will be the final score of your faith ? Or do you believe that you are smoking hot, batting 100% on the Lord's team?  Do you simply trust that you hit a home run with Jesus based on your past performance and that you are good-to-go-to-heaven-as-is? Do you justify not needing to attend church because you already read God's word and believe in Jesus? "The harvest is ready but the workers are few" Do you stand in the midst of a land full of broken people, while the Holy Spirit resides in you, totally silenced by your unwillingness, because you feel too weak and inadequate? "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Are you absolutely content with your eternal destination? Is your soul completely satisfied in itself? Are you self-sufficient or do you need Jesus?  God does not require your participation here on 

earth because He has it handled. With or without you, His will is being done. Do you think God is lucky to call you His own because you regularly offer up prayers for the poor and donate some coins to the orphans? Is God pleased with the amount of time and earnest compassion you extend? Do you choose to watch sports over spending time in God's word to renew your mind? Do you consider yourself full of the spirit because of your knowledge of scripture? Do you observe those who really need the Lord and pray that Jesus will light a fire in them, but you trust that your warm home and heart pleases God Almighty? Has your pride been conquered by Christ? Do you speak and pray with the authority that you are under? Are you overcome and humbled by the power and presence of the One Holy God? Is Jesus Christ your master? Are you His servant? Are you chained to His chariot and willing to allow Him to do the driving? Are you thrilled to admit that your are weak, 

that your will has been conquered, and therefore you are in need of guidance by a loving, redemptive, all powerful God? Pastor Bob Hendrick's sermon on Sunday December 14, 2014 is worthy of your ear. Listen to what the Spirit of God is saying to His people, His church, His chosen. Are you seeking the lost? Are you even batting for the Lord? What other King has ever left His throne, to greet you with mercy, to lay down His life for you? Revelation 3:15-20 ~ Lord Jesus I pray that You work miracles in the minds, hearts and thirsty souls of all listeners. We celebrate Your reason for birth on this earth, and rebirth in us.Click this link and ask Jesus to set your heart on fire! LCBC Notes
The Holy Spirit works through God's Word to renew our minds. As He restores our minds to the truth, our desires change, and our faith increases by hearing the testimonies of the changed life of Saul, the allegiance of Daniel, the faithfulness of God to generations of unfaithful people. Our hope

is confirmed by the indwelt Holy Spirit, who counsels us with wisdom. He reminds us of who we are in Christ Jesus, our Lord, and that His work in us continues to transform us. We are God's beloved creations, we are His chosen ambassadors of good will. The gospel is simple. God came down to make Himself known through His perfect Son, Jesus Christ, who purposefully chose to die on a cross for our sins. Our holy God forgave our sins through the blood of Jesus and we are justified  by Christ alone. We are privileged to wear His robe of righteousness and represent Him on earth. We are legally adopted into God’s family. As His beloved, we experience His grace, and His uncompromising promises. By His authority, we are filled with the Holy Spirit, so we can choose to love our enemies, forgive those who wrong us, and remain dependent on His unfailing love. God requires our full submission in order for us to receive a steady transmission of His plan and purpose for us. LIGHT our hearts on fire, Lord.  AMEN

Faith is a Gift

Faith is a free gift from God, and the blessings of God are given to us because we trust in Whom we have never seen.  How does a person acquire faith?  By seeking and trusting God, by believing in God, in His sovereign rule, in His creation, in God’s way above the way of the world, or man.  What is faith? It is the confident assurance that something we want is going to happen.  It is the certainty that what we hope for is waiting for us, (eternal life without pain, suffering, death or taxes) even though we cannot see it up ahead.  By faith, we believe that God created the world, the galaxies, the neurons, the atmosphere, the

human heart, the amazing human brain, all the animals, birds, fish, plants and the oxygen needed by all things.   Some hero’s of the FAITH were laughed at, had their backs cut open with whips, Peter was beheaded, Stephen was stoned, some were sawed in two. Because of Sarah’s faith she gave birth to Isaac when she was in her nineties. Then because her husband Abraham had faith he offered their son Isaac up as a human sacrifice.  Mary, Joseph, Jacob, Moses, Gideon, Jeremiah, Samuel, Joshua, David, Paul, Peter and even the prostitute Rahab were all ordinary people, and to begin with, their gifted faith was as small as a mustard seed.  Each trusted God by the faith God gave them when they first believed that a 

Messiah was coming, according to the holy scriptures. They did not have the bible as we do today, and none received all that God had promised them before they died.  The superior reward for our faith today will be delivered to us in heaven. All the people of faith mentioned in the Old Testament never saw God in the flesh, in the person of Jesus.   The God breathed holy Scriptures purposely shares many stories of un-renounced FAITH in the face of hardship, impossibility and persecution.  The old testament LAW’s purpose is to show God’s high standard, which is 100% perfection.  God knows that humanity cannot live up to, or live out a life of perfection, therefore, because God loves mankind so much, supernaturally, God came to earth as the person of Jesus Christ, to live, to teach by His humble example, to serve mankind, and to become the perfect sacrifice in order that all who believed in Him, could be washed, cleansed, made holy, and given the right to stand before a holy God, in the name of Jesus. It is by His authority, and by His will, not our obedience that we are given the faith to believe, and to overcome. People cannot be saved by keeping the ten commandments, nor can people throw away the gift of faith, or their salvation in their ongoing imperfect understanding of God's will and ways. When a person comes to believe in God, and that the sinless man Jesus died for them as a perfect sacrifice, and that Jesus rose from the dead,  then the Holy Spirit comes into them, never to depart, and the gift of faith is received.  Our Lord Jesus taught to pray the Lord’s prayer. Our Father who art in heaven…respected is Thy holy name Jehovah, Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.”  Hallelujah! God operating in us, His hope for glory.  Bible: Romans 4:16; Hebrews 11; Matthew 6:9; Colossians 1:26.  See comments below for more bible references regarding justification.